[Izzy Montoya] She spent the afternoon just… driving. Then made a stop or three, then finally arrived home, before Derek said he would arrive. She’s been doing nothing but trying not to think of her failed hookup – well, not failed for him – that afternoon, or what it might mean, but of course she’s done nothing but think of it since. And now, she’s in her room, a beer (not her first) in her hand, staring at the dresser like it might bite her.
The set of drawers on the left is open, and a couple of boxes sit on the floor next to it. She’s managed to empty the top two, but somehow, the third, filled with men’s shirts and sweaters, gives her pause. There’s already a garment bag or two filled and zipped up and tucked far in the back of the walk in closet. That part was easy.
This, however. This was far harder than she thought possible.
And so it is, when Derek does arrive, he finds her sitting on the edge of the bed in just boxers and a tank top, a pile of shirts in her lap, a beer in her hand, and a far away look in her eyes.
[Derek Anderson] He had been at the gym, working out, listening to the various discussions. Some were about the fucking sexy cop that came the day before. Others were about what diet to go on for better results, some were about steroids, a few ladies asked him what he was doing later. He grinned at them, gave them a maybe, ended up with a few phone numbers and eventually left the gym.
He spent a part of the afternoon checking if there was nothing new, sent an APB about blonded killed strangled. If any were found, Detective Montoya was to be contacted about them before the scene has been touched. Then as the afternoon ends, he went ot his place, picked a few pants, a pair of jeans, t-shirts and shirts and toiletterie and made his way to Izzy, stopping on the way to get some BBQ chicen and fries they can reheat easilly in the oven.
He enters the appartment. Not finding her on the couch, he leaves the food on the counter and looks around. He finds her in her room. He tilts his head at her look and places his bag down on the floor and move to lean against the dresser, gently picking up her beer from her hand
“Hey, you ok?”He ask, looking into her eyes, drinking from her bottle before handing it back to her.
They weren’t a couple..nope..but little gestures like that, the sharing of everything, came easilly to him…but it would with anyone..right?
[Izzy Montoya] She lets him take the beer. That wouldn’t happen with just anyone. Not really. But she doesn’t think about it, because that ties in to too many other things that she’s trying not to think about, and she just…
Well. She takes the beer back, and takes a swallow, before she glances up at him, then back to the pile of shirts in her lap. “I…wasn’t quite expecting them to still smell like his cologne. Like him…”
Him. John. He’s been under cover for over a year and a half without word – and even the best can’t go that far under, go that deep, without becoming corrupted ( and he’d never be corrupted, of that she is certain.) Or dead. It’s a hard thing to pack his things, to move them aside for someone new, who she’s refusing to think about because that means that a part of her is giving John up. Giving him up for dead.
“I.. didn’t expect it to be hard. It wasn’t, at first. There’s room in the closet, the top two drawers are empty… but these two. This…” She lifts a hand, slightly, and lets it fall back into her lap, sliding across the sweater in a soft caress. “And I’m so…”
He might expect her to say sad, lost, something similar. What comes out instead is this… “…angry at him.” But even that sounds more sad than anything else.
[Derek Anderson] He watches her, listening. “I didn’t bring that much stuff you know. Two drawers is enough.” He doesn’t tell her that he doesn’t want to take John’s place..because he isn’t..right? He doesn’t tell her that he wants to make it less hard on her by using the 2 drawers that had been more easy to empty. She would hate that part. But he could see how hard it was for her and he didn’t want that. They weren’t together..she shouldn’t have to let her mate go.
Then again, it’s been a really long time and even really deep undercover agents usally are able to send a message now and again.
“I’ll get us new beers” He pick hers again, down it and head out, coming back shortly with two new, opened bottles. He hand one to her “How did your day go? Had fun with big guy?”
He meant it as a playful comment, as in the hope that the guy wasn’t too full of himself..not literally, though she might take it that way.
[Izzy Montoya] She looks at his bag, and her lips curl into a slight smirk, that’s softer than it would seem to others. He knows her best, though, has seen her at her most vulnerable, has still let her maintain her facade of control. “I see that.”
Then, she shakes her head, and leans forward to place the bundle in her lap into the empty box, and nods. “Better to do it all at once, I think. Then have to go through it all again.” She’s convincing herself, maybe. Or him. Not that it matters either way, because they’re not a couple.
Really.
He returns with the beers, and she takes one, and finishes setting the contents of the two drawers into the box, and nudging it aside. It’s not gone, not out of sight, but at least out of the dresser. She takes a swallow or two, and then snorts.
“Ultimately, he was unsatisfying.”
Indeed.
[Derek Anderson] “They can’t all be winners I guess.” He grins and drinks from his bottle. Maybe he simply meant as a source of info…but more than likely, he knows what she did with the body builder. He actually doesn’t liek how it nags him a little to know she had sex with someone else..after all they weren’t together. She can do whatever the fuck she wants. Same as he.
He moves to sit beside her, leaving his bottle on the dresser. He nudges her playfully “Stop taking all the place” He say with a grin. He reach for his bag and start fillingup the drawers slowly, letting help if she feels like it. Maybe his scent on his own clothes will help her mood a little.
“I brought us some chicken and fries for dinner. Didn’t know what you’d be in the mood for.” He says, looknig at her as he put his clothes in the drawers.
[Izzy Montoya] Lips curl into a smirk as he nudges her, and she scooches over a bit, before reaching to help him unpack. She holds a t-shirt up to her face a moment, and breathes in, and chuckles briefly. “Not bad.” And then she helps him put his things away.
She nods to his idea of dinner, and then revisits the nagging subject… finally. “He..” Her brows furrow, and she shakes her head, downs a good portion of her beer, before admitting. “He wasn’t you.” As she takes his work clothing and goes to hang them up in the closet.
It bothers her too, and maybe that’ll help him with that little nag, because it’s clearly under her skin a bit too. More than a bit.
[Derek Anderson] He grins at her comment “Not bad? I certainly hope so…Ipsent years cultivating my wonderful scent” He says, bunper her with his shoulder. They fills the drawers together until she speaks again…for her words stops him in mid motion. He blinks twice and then put the clothes in the drawer.
His blue eyes look at her face, reading her expression. “That’s not something I ever thought I’d hear you say.”
He let her go hang his clothes before motioning her closer to him, bringing her gently to sit on his lap, his arms surrounding her waist, resting lazilly against her hip..if she accept to sit. “So does it mean to you exactly…that he wasn’t me? You can lie..but I hope you’ll be honest..even if you..and maybe I don’t like the answer…or don’t want to admit that it might mean something we said it never would.”
He didn’t seem to be expecting a particularanswer. He was taken aback by the turn of event and slightly confused. He thought things had changed a little..but they weren’t that kind of peple..the couple kind, they just fucked together…..despite the fact it’s been a week since he slept at his place and now a part of his wardrobe was in her drawers and closet.
”
[Izzy Montoya] She doesn’t reply, not at first, not while she hangs his clothing where Johns were until recently – very recently. She didn’t think she’d ever see someone’s clothing there again. John is – no, was her soulmate.
But no one ever said you were limited to just one in a lifetime.
“Me either.” She lets him pull her closer, then even to sit on his lap, even if she snorts, briefly, in amusement at the ultimate intimacy and couplish feeling of such a simple act. He may think she’s going to brush it off, that she’s going to pass it off with some joke, some smirk, something ultimately bitchy and smart ass… But she’s honest. She always has been.
“I… don’t know. And that’s the fuckin’ honest truth. I know it fuckin terrifies me. I don’t do commitment, you know that. Not before John. Not since. But…” And here, her brow furrows slighlty as she rest her forehead against his, briefly. “It wasn’t supposed to be anything but a fuckin good time. And here you are – here you been, and will be most likely… And I am all kinda fucked up about it. I’m no good at this shit, Derek.”
And that’s the truth.
[Derek Anderson] He listens to her words, looking at her. “Then don’t commit. Let’s just see how things go. I still have my place, I can use it once in a while when you feel too crowded. You didn’t have fun with that guy earlier…then maybe let’s agree on not sleeping with others for now. When one of us is not comfortable with it anymore, then it’s back ot how things were..or jsut go our separate ways.
I know i care about you, I know you’re important to me and I know that there wouldn’t have been many women who could have make me stop seeing you. Now maybe you’ll ask me to stop seeing other women..that’s not a hard decision. I don’t want to lose you right now. Maybe not ever. So let’s take things slowly.”One hand reach for her cheek as he grins
“And if you agree…well then we can seal it with a kiss, your ass in my face or a sixty nine..all works for me to make us..kinda like something similar to an idea of a couple”
He was teasing her..mostly. They would definatly be something really close to a couple after tonight. And that was scary.
[Izzy Montoya] She leans into his touch, slightly, as he lays out the possibilities that can exist without ever really suggesting the whole couple thing […what would Kora say?!] and still have them exploring to see where it really goes.
And he gives her an idea of how to seal the deal too – as if she needed in prompting for that. She waits a moment, then two, and the with a smirk, she tips her head and captures her lips with her own, before demanding. “All of the above. You have too much clothing on.” So she sets out to remedy the situation.
Its much easier to ignore her fears when his skin is pressed against hers, his sex buried deep within her…
It was scary.
Scary good.
[Derek Anderson] He had smirked at her words. She took of his clothing, he took off what was left of hers. They sealed the deal in thei usual fashion, through wild, passionate, lustful sex..something hard, primitive, so they didn’t have to think too much about the decision they just made. They weren’t just fuck buddies anymore..they were more..maybe even much more. Not the the fucking will leave their life now..that would be highly doubtful.
After donig what he had offered her as choices and much more, they laid in the bed, body pressed against body, sweaty, breathing fast, enjoying he other’s warmth, scent, presence. After some time, Derek went to the kitchen to reheat the chicken and fries. He brought back some beer so they could drink a little while the dinner was in the oven.
Eventually, they ate, naked, checking the board, exchanging some info that they might have gathered during the day. The case was still very important but it had been a slow day for new clues. Once dinner was over, Derek smiled, kissed her deeply and lifted her up and brought her back to bed.
They had sex, liek they had once, something different but good..like their situation. They spent the rest of the evening in bed, fucking another time and much later both fell asleep, against each other, exhausted, smiling, a restful night well earned ahead of them.
[Izzy Montoya] [aaaaand fade. :) ]